Dear, dear uterus,
I know we’re not always
On the best of terms but
Possibly the worst time
For you to get in a fistfight with yourself
Is when I’ve got a long drive home
In the rain.
And I get it, you’re upset
You know I’m sorry about that,
Device I had to put
I’m sure it sucks to share a living space
With an inanimate piece of metal
That jabs you every so often
You remember last spring right?
I know, I know,
You we’re just doing your job
And a good job at that
You know what we had to go through
I’m sure you still cringe
Every time I run the vacuum cleaner
Things just are the way they are
And it sucks a whole lot but
I’m saving money and you’re
Safe from scar tissue
No need to have a temper tantrum
Every single month, okay?
I’m sure I deserve it—
Just not when I’m behind the wheel?
If we fucking crash,
It’s totally your fault.